Updated: May 23
I have always wanted people to feel good, and to be happy. I wanted people to feel loved, wanted, needed, and valued, knowing that we each mattered more than we realized. I knew that love was the greatest of all medicines, and that we each carry this medicine within our own hearts.
Since childhood, I had a natural curiosity about the world. I would listen to the stories my father would share about the universe, and I would wonder what was “out there”, and how am I “here”. I felt this sense that my true “home” was from “up there somewhere” yet could not understand how I was “here”, now. I also knew that we were all connected to everything, and nothing could ever destroy the connections. I knew the connection was natural and eternal.
I never told anyone that I could speak to the rocks, bugs, animals, birds, flowers, plants, and trees, and that I could also feel them speak to me. I thought everyone could! I hugged trees, and loved climbing up to their tops, gently swaying in the wind. The wind on my skin and the wide-open sky always nourished me. I felt God everywhere and knew that he did not sit on some throne up in heaven “out there” somewhere. He was not one to ever fear, nor someone who would ever punish or abandon me. God was here, was everywhere, and loved me. I knew God loves everyone and everything. Always.
I did not understand earlier in my life that I was an empath. I did not understand that others around me could not see or feel what I was naturally able to feel and perceive. My grandmother would whisper her lessons to me after glancing around to make sure no one was listening, teaching me about how to make medicines from the plants she nurtured and grew. This cannot be heard by just anyone, she would tell me. People may be listening, and I had to be careful.
Since childhood, I have had many dreams, premonitions, and visions. I always knew I had a Calling. Some of the things I could see scared me. I experienced déjà vu frequently. As I grew, my level of vulnerability grew. I was not yet aware that I was ungrounded, nor did I understand what sovereignty meant. I lacked healthy boundaries, not realizing that some of the sensations I felt were not my own. I was afraid to tell anyone what I was experiencing for fear of being laughed at, criticized, judged, or rejected. Even worse, maybe I was crazy! Back then, no one was allowed to speak of “such things” for various reasons, so I shut down and remained silent, suffering inside with a darkness that felt consuming. I tried so hard to run from my calling and gifts. None of this felt good and I no longer wanted my gifts … at all. I was overwhelmed. Numbness, anxiety, depression, anger, and fear seemed to be suffocating me. I could put on my makeup and “game face”, plow myself through anything, but I couldn’t anymore. I met my own breaking point. This is where my own true healing began. I finally stopped running and surrendered. This was my awakening. Through my own healing, I learned what I now share. I also learned that everything occurred because I was being prepared to serve and manifest the fulfillment of the Calling I accepted. I was learning and remembering once again how to BE … ME.
Through my own experiences and healing, I learned directly, and from those whom God sent to teach and mentor me, how to claim my free will, sovereignty, and personal power. I learned how to ground and clear my energetic fields and body. I learned how to cut and shift energetic cords, track, cleanse, retrieve and restore energy, use my senses, and develop discernment skills and boundaries. As I learned from my mother but had to experience myself to truly integrate, I could always rely upon the Blessed Mother, the Woman with Many Names. I could call upon her always and she would protect me. I could always go to her, and she would always help me. I asked our Divine Mother long ago to teach me how to be a woman just like her. And she IS. God’s Love flows and radiates through.
Today, I share what I have learned and continue to learn with anyone I am sent to and anywhere I am sent. Each one of us is a Vessel of the Divine and what a privilege to have a front row seat bearing witness to the Miraculous co-created with God through us. As Walter Russel had written, “God does not work for us. God works with us.” It brings my own heart joy witnessing the lights go on in someone’s eyes when they have made their own connections and break throughs. My desire is to turn the lights on everywhere, and this is not hard. Everything is Light. My service is to help teach methods and bring awareness to ways one can remove and polish that which seemed to block the light and to rejoice together when the brilliance of that light is restored to its natural True Essence. We are all Divine.
I am grateful to all those who saw something within me when I had forgotten and had shut down. I am the child loved by many and my gratitude now radiates to honor them. May anything good that flows through my hands, heart, and mind honor and bless all who have loved and blessed me. I am here, because of Love.
So are YOU.